Then, assess if you feel you can trust the person before you “go there,” Fisher says, noting that a healthy level of closeness requires time (read: numerous dates) to develop.And if a new date makes an off-color joke, issues a hurtful remark or judgment, or withdraws from a tricky conversation, Fisher says, consider these harbingers of what’s to come if you get more serious.D., a postdoctoral fellow at the University of Texas at Austin.But these aren’t the only reasons you should listen to what a date’s saying.Yes, getting intimate involves sharing deeper truths about who you are and what shaped you (incuding previous relationships).But it’s generally not a great idea to dive head first into deeply personal disclosures on date numero uno, Fisher says.24-hour interval, day, mean solar day, solar day, twenty-four hour period, twenty-four hours - time for Earth to make a complete rotation on its axis; "two days later they left"; "they put on two performances every day"; "there are 30,000 passengers per day"nowadays, present - the period of time that is happening now; any continuous stretch of time including the moment of speech; "that is enough for the present"; "he lives in the present with no thought of tomorrow"24-hour interval, day, mean solar day, solar day, twenty-four hour period, twenty-four hours - time for Earth to make a complete rotation on its axis; "two days later they left"; "they put on two performances every day"; "there are 30,000 passengers per day" the dim days of King Ethelred, when the Danes anchored their warships in the Kennet, and started from Reading to ravage all the land of Wessex; and here Ethelred and his brother Alfred fought and defeated them, Ethelred doing the praying and Alfred the fighting.
That's not to say you should lie about these things, but try focusing on the upsides and positives in your life before launching into the real-er stuff.
Once you’ve moved to the messaging stage, replace neutral words, such as "happy" or "fine," with more upbeat ones, like "excited" and "wonderful." Subtle lingo tweaks like these have been shown to boost our appeal to potential suitors.
Also, express interest in what the other person is saying: "Oh, that's interesting you work in finance. " or "Very cool about your meditation practice—what do you like most about it?
Think: "Looking for someone who loves old movies / who reads / who's active and enjoys the outdoors." Not: "Looking for someone to spend the rest of my life with, who supports me unconditionally, and loves me for all my flaws." (We all want that, but shoving it in everyone's face right off the bat can feel intimidating, oppressive, and desperate.)“There is nothing less informative than, ‘I am very close to my family and friends’ or ‘I love to go to dinner and hang out with my family and friends,’" Salkin says.
Avoid generalizations and be specific to stand out from the rest of the online crowd: “Instead of ‘I love to travel,’ say where you’ve traveled, how often you travel, if you do it for work or for pleasure, or where you’d like to go in the future,” she suggests.
Spilling too much about your life early on can drive others away, studies suggest.